Does 'The One' Exist?

Sunday, March 04, 2018

I'm sure everyone who has had a lover, has ever doubted whether their partner is the right one. The right one to be with for the rest of their lives. In times like this, we so often wondered: Is he/ she the right one for me? But lately, for me the question has changed a bit to whether there is the right one at all.

outerwear - Hey Mermaid

Of course, a person with nonstop thought like me has some friends who does the same. So I threw the the question to the WhatsApp Group that evening:
"What do you guys think of this statement: 'Love is not about finding the right person, but creating a right relationship' ".

6 minutes later a friend answered "Agree".

then I replied: "How could one relationship be right if not with the right person?"

another one replied: "Yeah. What if loving the wrong person feels right??" (This one. So funny.)
but she replied to herself quickly: "That's what you call 'Toxic Relationship' " (Hmm true.)

Anyways, another person joined in (she's one of us who's had more lovers than us--if you're reading this, don't be offended, you just do because you're a lover and so easy to be loved :) ) She went: "Actually, the right person doesn't exist". (Okay. Coming from a person who's more experienced than myself. I'm paying attention)

"I've been having relationships that gave me excitements. It was all butterflies and sparkles since the beginning. But it didn't work at the end. The excitement was made purposely by him to make me happy. But was he happy? That's exactly why it didn't last. In the beginning of the relationship, I really thought that this person cannot be more right for me, this is going to be so beautiful. I was wrong. So the statement is accurate: It is about creating the right relationship."

So I went: "What makes a relationship right?"

The big answer below is like a big mix of our thoughts:

"Learning from my parents.. It is right when the two people make the same effort to keep it together. Maybe not exactly the same, but enough to make it last. And, they have to be able to compromise, like a lot. Like all the time for years. Of course, you cannot practice this with anyone. There are some basics that the person has to possess: Same life goals, similar background and some personal principles. But there won't be the right, perfect person. What you have to find is not the right one, but the nice ones; not the types who won't commit, not the type who's abusive, not the one who goes behind your back."

So much to take in. But I guess it's not wrong. You question whether your partner is the one for you when you have doubts/ when there's a personality from him or her that you're not sure you can live with forever. Or when he/ she makes a mistake (that you should be able to forgive and let it go). But this is where compromise takes place. Whether you can accept it or not, that's when you decide whether you're compatible for each other or not, whether you can forgive and let go. So at the end of the day, your partner becomes the right one when you both can create a right relationship.

So I guess, there is no "The One". But there are "The Ones" that you two together can create a right, cherishing, long-lasting relationship.

As Will Smith has said: You don't expect your partner to make you happy. But you let your partner to be by your side, when you create your own happiness. Because happiness comes from inside you. And as I've believed, whatever inside you comes from The Above.

Oh, one last thing. I've heard a quote from a movie: Sometimes, good enough is enough. It's a matter of being thankful.

Here's some pics from my last trip to Melbourne!

Oh and, I almost forgot how good it is to be writing again.


We started from CBD Melbourne, and this is the amazing view that we got to see, literally The Great Ocean Road:

We stopped by to get lunch at The Lorne Pier Seafood:

Drove again to Mariner's Lookout, view was pretty amazing from the top. 

Continued to The Cape Otway Lighthouse - During winter you'll get to see many Koalas on the way there, but not so much when it's so hot. We only spotted one!

After that, the last stop of the day was Twelve Apostles. I've been there several years ago, but still as mesmerizing.
We stayed the night at Warnambool, before moving on to The Grampians National Park the next day.

Last but not least, we went to a winery - Chandon. They've got pretty cute interiors!

Thanks for scrollin!

Jeslina x

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2 komentar

  1. السلامه عليكم ورحمة الله وبركاته نحن فى شركة الكمال نقوم بافضل واقوى المبيدات العالميه الموجودة

    التى تقضى على جميع الحشرات الطائره والزاحفة وابادة الحشرات
    شركة مكافحة حشرات بالطائف
    شركة مكافحة حشرات بجازان
    شركة مكافحة حشرات بحائل
    شركة مكافحة حشرات بحائل
    والسلامة عليكم وحمة الله وبركاته


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